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Monday, September 25
# 4:26 PM

today its the start of sch again.. so is meow meow's attachment n courses.. hope she will b alright..
wish tt i can lighten my heart abit more so i can dun let her feel so tie up.. hmm i muz try somemore.. missin her today n i tink i tink alittle too much again. bt tis time i can control.. cuz i trust her even more.. juz wonder if i have did anything tt make her trust mi even alittle.. i will try harder.. i wan to b a better man.. i hate my old self..

Zean's heart : "hey Zean.. being urself is alright.. juz nt the bad side.. u noe how to see wat is good n bad right.. ur problem is tt u noe its nt very good to say things.. bt u juz cant stop immediately. try harder.. find urself back.. the good one.. haha.."

i noe i'm dumb to talk to myself.. bt its the onli way i can remember things.. my memory becomin bad day by day.. wonderin wats happenin..

i need to come here n read tru my feelins n things i have said n stuff.. sry meow meow.. guess i'm stil nt good enough for u.. everyone have their own tinkin.. one juz have to listen to the other n tink/ join the ideas together to see wat is the out come.. quarrel will sure lessen if both side can understand. (tis words is for myself too.. nt sayin anyone. nt pin point anyone. so dun get offended)

i startin nt to like guys much.. their tinkin is so corrupted.. have they even tink for the girls.. guess everyone is selfish.. have a bigger heart n dun b petty.. as long as the person who u care for noe the limit.. let it b..

Zean's heart : "u lie n hide too.. thou u noe wat is bad n u dun go do it.. bt do u noe tt lyin hurt those who care for u? b honest if its really bad.. listen to others advise.. tink abt the comments. dun object straight.. tink again.. n nicely talk out.. sometime ppl juz wan to care bt dunno how to express. "

my goal now is to make myself a better one.. wee. so friends can accept mi, meow meow can accept mi n we make a happy relationship with honesty, understandin..

dear god.. pls protect meow meow frm all the bad things.. b it how ppl treat her, tink of her m stuff.. she is someone impt to mi..

waitin for meow meow end the attachment den meet her go eat dinner.. hee.. i need to slowly save up.. for the future with meow.. i dun care.. i will wait.. cuz frm the beginnin i already take u as my future wife.. i noe its childish to say so early especially ppl who noe i'm poor.. bt i take it serious.. she is the onli one.. i dun mind her past or wat.. i noe its mi who dun cherish her.. bt i have learn my bad. i will change.. T.T sry to keep wantin u to b with mi such a useless guy..

guess i talk too much.. later other days nth to say.. guess i'm juz like tt.. keep repeatin myself.. dunno y.. i tink i gettin weird.. my mind got some problem.. mayb got short term memory or brain got problem. haha.. wish to b with meow.. watch movie, hug her slp , alot.. juz to love her n stuff..

; wings of hope where are you?___`
Zean aka Tsuki
single
10 march 1988